The Sum of Life

Almost all families try to find a church connection. For instance, one man died in jail. (He was taking out the trash and just died.) Our pastor is very heavily involved in a ministry at our jail, so this man had been hearing the Word and therefore we know that if in those last seconds he wanted to make a decision for Christ, he could have. But we don’t know if he did or not.

In his obituary, his family noted that he had “once attended” a particular church. We printed this information because while it was a completely superfluous detail about his life, it was one of great importance to his grieving family. It gave them hope, hope that his life had not been in vain, and also hope that there was some chance for him to have eternal life.

Another obituary really made my editor’s eyes go wide. The only thing the family could think to write was, “She was a good cook.”

My editor said, “If that’s all my family can come up with to say about me at the end of my life, please tell them not to say anything at all.”

It wasn’t a bad thing to say, except that it didn’t really say anything. If they had said, “She loved to cook for her family,” well, at least, she would have been cooking for a loving, giving reason. Certainly that’s why we’re here, isn’t it? To give to others?

And yet, even if a person’s obituary is filled with examples of altruism, in the end, we can’t be sure that these acts weren’t done out of some sort of self-satisfaction tied to the joy of hearing men praise the person for his/her good works.

And what if in giving, we have invested all of our energies truly altruistically but into services that ultimately do just the opposite of what we would have liked?

For instance, a recent obituary brought tears to my eyes. Listed high on the list of this man’s life achievements were memberships in the civil liberties union and PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). He was also a member of a church, and his family described him as a Micah 6:8 man, one who “loved justice, mercy, and walked humbly with his God.”

I’m not an expert on either of the organizations mentioned, but I know enough to realize that often these organizations pervert justice and the “mercy” they desperately are trying to pour out is really just keeping people trapped in a lifestyle that God never intended for any of his creation.

Then came the question, “So if he was really walking ‘humbly’ with his God, why was he so active in organizations that don’t always, and some might even say, ‘rarely’ serve God’s purposes?”

My husband’s answer was, “He served his god, not THE God.” This could very well be true. After all, many devoted church members are serving a god made in their own images rather than THE God. A god in our own image isn’t likely to ask us to do anything we don’t really want to do, but THE God is almost always going to stretch our comfort zones and ask us to do things that we definitely are not going to be able to do in our own strength.

So maybe this man spent his life truly “in vain” because he served a god with a different agenda from THE God.

But since I’m trying to walk humbly before THE God, I put the question to Him, “What was this man doing?”

Because God does not encourage me to judge this man nor how he spent his life, He simply asked, “What if I asked you to join PFLAG, like a double-agent, to attend to my agenda, planting seeds of hope in a field of thorns?”

I immediately knew that for the most part, acceptance of such an assignment would mean putting myself at odds with most of the Christian world. Most Christians would not understand such a calling and would reject me.

In acceptance of such a call, I would have to live most of my life in the enemy camp.

Oddly enough, such a gift would not require me to lie because I truly would be participating as a “friend” to lesbians and gays. I would, in an act of true friendship, try to help deceived people be led to freedom.

It would have to be a lifetime work and most people would never see the real fruit of such a labor. It would make my family proud and so in my obituary it might be listed first among my accomplishments, although casual readers would probably be asking the same questions of me and my character as I asked about the Micah 6:8 man.

But in the end, GOD WOULD KNOW, and that would be all that would matter, because His summation of my life is all that counts.

When God reviews the true obituaries in heaven, we may find them a far more interesting read than the ones thrown together by our families.

For instance, He might look at the man who died in jail and see a prayer like unto the thief on the cross that was breathed at the last and accepted.

God might see a million deeds done by the “good cook” - a hundred and fifty meals given in secret to families in need and a thousand more provided to shut-ins, but given in anonymity even from the family’s eyes.

And God might look at the man who was like Micah 6:8 and see an undercover agent who did more than an evangelist with a national ministry.